Last night I opened a very disturbing piece of mail. Then I lay awake all night worrying - so much for living by faith! I'm not proud of my lack of faith, but that's me - SO much like Peter - looking at the waves and starting to sink! (Matthew 14:22 - 36)
Our oldest son took our two oldest grandchildren out in a canoe one Sunday afternoon. Our grandson began to get a bit nervous as they got farther and farther from shore. He asked, "Dad, can you swim to shore from here?" His dad answered, "Yes, Matthew. I can probably stand on the bottom and walk to shore from here." "OK, Dad." A bit further out, Matthew asked the question again. His dad gave him the same answer. Matthew breathed a sigh of relief and said, "OK, that's good, because if we tip over I don't know if Jesus can get here in time." His dad reminded Matthew of how Jesus took care of His disciples in a boat in a storm. Matthew's response was: "I know, but that was a bigger boat than this canoe because there were more than 12 men in that boat."
I thought that was a funny story, but after last night I realize I have the same mentality. I'm living like I'm not sure Jesus can take care of me and my problems. My worrying last night was no different than my grandson doubting "Jesus could get there in time." It's so hard to trust God and wait and rest. My way is to do what I can do to "fix" the problem or to do what I did last night and worry about how I'm going to fix the problem. What I need to do is let Jesus "do His thing" to restore the broken piece of life (no matter what it is) in His time and in His way.
It is like the old hymn says, "Trust and obey for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus but to trust and obey."
My head knows He can fix anything - even this problem! My head knows Jesus loves and cares for us. The problem is with my heart. My heart is scared because - like Peter when he got out of the boat to walk to Jesus on the water - I start looking at the waves instead of looking at the Savior. That's when I sink into worry.
My prayer needs to be: "O, God, give me a heart to trust You and to wait for Your restoring grace." It may not be easy, but with a restored heart and keeping my eyes on my Savior - It's always right and good! Jesus said, "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? ... seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ... do not worry about tomorrow ... " (Matthew 6:27 - 34)